And yet the saga continues…it seems another girl friend here and gone. What is it these days? I mean this time I didn’t even really do anything to piss her off and then she ends up getting upset and acting all weird. This one was really nice too. She wasn’t in any way a model, but I didn’t fall for her because of that. It was the inside of her that I liked. I mean very genuine and kind and probably the nicest girl too. Plus, she actually had ethics and morals. The pitiful part is that this thing only lasted two weeks! I could understand if I was in 8th grade or something like that but I am a junior in college!
I tried to make it up to her and I said that I would call her this morning and we’d get together and do something….so I called her at around 10:46AM. She didn’t answer so I left her a voice mail. Here it is 4:00pm in the afternoon and still no return call. I am easily thinking by now that she doesn’t care so I guess I’ve reached another dead end on my life long journey of relationships; only to have to turn around and find my way back to the main road. Granted this thing only lasted two weeks...but honestly I can not stand another relationship. It is so annoying to get your hopes up and then to be shot down over....and over....and over again. You would of thought that God would have created atleast one nice girl out there for me. I think my main problem is that I'm to nice. I try to always bend over backwards for people and I usually get screwed. So right now it seems really appealing to me to act like an ass hole to girls like 90% of the other guys do at this school just so I can have girls around me all the time. Yet, I was raised the exact opposite way and abandoning the very subconsciousness that has been hard written into my brain is quite hard. But sometimes I just feel like it is not worth it to push myself out again only to have an anvil tied to my feet so I can drown and wallow in self pitty at the bottomless pits of the deep ocean.
This was actually the first girl that I have dated since I moved here to go to school. What a great way to start things off.
Best Wishes, Josh