"If you are a christian, does that limit you to listen to christian music alone?" From my perspective, I don't believe that you are bound to some contractual agreement to only listen to christian music. Sadly I actually have a hard time listening to a lot of christian music. I really don't know why...I mean I like most of the popular christian artists but at the same time their music just gets annoying to the ear. But I must admit that there is one christian artist that catches my ear and that is shane barnard. I love the way he can sing really high and plays guitar extremely aggressive...But that is not the point of why I am writing tonight...
I had a chance this morning to go to an episcapal church this morning in addition from my normal worship experience at my church, and I must say that it was quite different. I noticed that they are quite traditional in both worship aspects and ideology. They participated in many congregational responses and had very long organ hymns. But the main reason I was there is because my weight lifting partner was preaching this morning at his church. I must say that his charisma was very impressive. I always knew that his social skills were good but I was awakened this morning because his able to walk around and use hand motions to communicate with the crowd very well. I know this is going to sound bad but directly it was a blessing, but indirectly it was not a blessing.
To understand this I'm going to need to give a little back ground. Before my GF and I started dating she told me that she made a vow to God that she would focus on him and not on any guy for a complete year after her last BF. Well, it will be one year on thanksgiving. Depending on your personal beliefs, it was not very smart to date. And I must make clear that we ended up dating and it was not because I pressured her or she pressured I, but merely the more we hung out, the more that we fit natrually with each other. Well, last night when ever she was driving home after comming from my house, she got pulled over by a cop and got a $200 or so ticket. She then proceeded to call me and we talked about for awhile and eventually got off the phone and went to bed.
Now, fast foward to this afternoon after we got back from church. She sat me down on my back porch and said to me that she think he reason she got the ticket was because it was a form of punishment for breaking her commitment with God, there for we should not see each other until after the year is totally up. Her exact words were, "If I hadn't of been with you, I wouldn't have gotten the ticket." This came to me as an utter horor. Just the night before we were sitting there cuddling and she said to me that she hopes this lasts for a life time, so you can imagine how confused I felt. In fact, I felt very dumb because I was litterally speechless. I mean it all hapened so fast that I was just kind of like dddduuuuuhhhhh.....Over all, she did say that we can get back together once the year period is up if we want to but right now she just feels like we need to be apart.
All in all, I am not mad one bit because if you really have feelings for someone then why should you let things like this anger you? I actually still have all my respect for her because she is the first girl that I have ever met not to compromise or sacrifice her personal religious insights because of a guy. At the same time I am struggling with drawing a conclusion that God's hand was in the process of her getting a ticket. I think sometimes I may over simplify things but, excessive speed = ticket...at this point I just half to have faith and hope that she was right in her presumptions of God's will......regardless, I still have tremendous overwhelming feelings for her. In comparison, in all the girl friends I have ever had I can only think of my current one and Em, that I can sit there and name good thing after good thing about them and not see a negative trait. To someone else that may not be very impressive, but to that person who knows that I am one of the most critical people in the world that is very picky and can be unforgiving, this is a huge thing. Everything I want in a future wife, she has; thats why this effected me quite a bit. I can only just hope that her decision was not a wrong one.
Well, being the optomistic person I am.....the only bright thing that I can think about this is that I will be able to work more and totally focus on school work. I can also minimize my personal costs and streamline my spending. I didn't really explain the title of this blog but the reason I chose this one is because "Be near of God" is an awesome song by shane barnard that I was listening to tonight that was kind of like a justifying force in a giant collection of mis-understanding. The words go something like this...
"you are all, big and small, beautiful. And wonderful to trust in grace through faith, but I am asking to taste. for dark is light to you, depths are height to you, far is near, but lord I need to hear from you, Be near oh God....." But the song is a must if you haven't heard it. Something in Shane's music has always been comforting to me.
Best Wishes, Joshua Price"
P.S. Thanks Geoff for telling about switchfoots' song, "dare you to breath." It is awesome.