From the disection of my other blogs, I have been told by others that it is extremely easy to tell that I am a very routine person in my ways. With this in mind it always amazes me how things change within the blink of an eye. The past week has been hectic because of stress at work but at the same time I had a revalation thursday night/friday morning that cannot really be explained in words, but I shall try.
Well, Tuesday and wednesday at work I was starting to worry because no customers were really responding and the possibility of new contracts were looking very slim. So, after getting off from work I went to church. First of all, I must say that I am so blessed to be in my men of standard bible study class. This group is compromised of men from around 35-70 who all gather together for mostly two reasons: to hold each other accountable as brothers in christ and to develop our personal relationships with God. One of the men that was in my small group, who has been a mentor and a very strong father figure, is the Vice President of an insurance agency in town and believe it or not he could identify with the same situation that I was in at work cause he had been there before. I shared with him the worries that had been on my mind and he then told me that when ever he had reached this point he made a realization that his key to being successful was to just help people in any way he could and not sell them something that they didn't need and to rely on God. So after two days of discouragement I took thursday off to recap and get some things done and I must say that it was the wisest decision I will ever make. Before I got to the office I prayed that I would not be successful in a greedy way, but to be able to just help people and so when I went in everything turned around and I may have three or four contracts lined up in this next week. Though I must add one thing, another reason for why things turned around was something kind of miraculous happened.
In many of my earlier blogs I have expressed the utmost desire of having a companion in my life. One that I could share trials, tribulations, joys and hope with, but also just to experience the many journey's of life that we go through. Most of the time I have a hard time finding someone that meets up to my standards or requirements that I have set and with that usually comes a long time of me searching for someone. But just recently someone who is sweet, caring, smart, and a godly woman, took a chance and decided to spend time and trust me and in the blink of an eye it was like we had known each other for a long time. What was really strange is that all the internal barriers that are standard with the begining of a crush on someone immediatley came crashing down revealing something that I have never experienced before. For lack of better words, I would say that I felt a connection with this person that was contrary to the very known existance for which I communicate with on a day to day basis that dug down deep into my soul. If you ask me I would say that it had to be devine intervention because I guess from external shots she would never be interested in a person like me but because of some force the decision was made and she invested some of her time with me and I know that this investment trippled if not quadruppled. At this point I don't really have any words to describe what happened but this quote will try to do some of it:
George Eliot
"Oh, the comfort, the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person; having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, but to pour them all out, just as they are, chaff and grain together, knowing that a faithful hand will take and sift them, keep what is worth keeping, and then, with a breath of kindness, blow the rest away."
This is probably the best that I can do to try to explain it. I have said this before and it may sound wierd coming from a nineteen year old but really I can't wait to get married to the one that has been chosen for me. Its the things like waking up beside your loved one in bed at morning to reach over and give them a pationate kiss regardless of what their breath smells like. Its the things like being able to open up to each other in all of sincerity because you know that they only have your best interest at mind. But also, its the things like going to church and doing devotions together that make me giddy in anticipation for my bride. All of these I like to call "the good stuff", which is a song by kenney chesney. It is must listen to if you have not sat down and listened to the lyrics and from then you will understand my complex feelings. A couple local couple that are prominent lawyers in town taught a bible study my senior year in high school called, "finding the love of your life", and I will never forget this one quote that they said to us:
"One person can have a profound effect on another. And two people...well, two people can work miracles. They can change a whole town. They can change the world. "
I know I am just rambling on but I must say that I have tried to record this week into words in the best possible fashion so that I will be able to look back upon this week as one of the most memorable points in my life. With only spending the small time together that we have I can just hope and pray that this will blossom into something beautiful and fufilling.
Best Wishes, Joshua Price
P.S. This song by 98 made me think of her. I have only heard it once or twice but I love the lyrics and here is the link:
http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/98degrees/takemybreathaway.html