My day so far has been pretty bad. I worked at west marine (my old job) all day long and we barley even had twenty people come in there. With the feeling of exhaustion pouring down upon me like torrential rains, all I could think about was all the stuff that I could be doing instead of wasting time here. Like for example, I had an accounting assignment due today at 12pm so I got up this morning at 6am just to make sure that I could get it done in time before I had to go to work at 7:30. At the end of the work day I was trying to find something to do with the little bit of energy that I had left that would somehow capture all the time that had been taken away from me today, but as I arrived home and settled into my office chair at my desk I realized that I need to rest. The only thing that made my day turn totally around was when ever I checked my email because I had an unexpected email from an individual that made light from darkness. I have taken out some things to take some lines to protect for identity purposes.
"... There are so many people out there that should be doing what you are. I have to admit I look up to you because of the fact that you are so young and have already accomplished a great deal...I like the fact that you can be flexible but you don't really do things you don't believe in doing. You are a wonderful person, Josh. You are gorgeous, sweet, funny, and you have wonderful goals. You are one of the few guys that can actually carry on a conversation. Now days all guys want to talk about is sex, sex, sex. You don't even have to be dating them, even guy friends are like that. You are a guy that can joke and be serious. Your head isn't full of air like most guys I know...I hope I know you for a very long time because I want to see the amazing person you grow into."
At our darkest times words of affirmation are held dearest of all in our hearts. One problem that I communicated in the last blog was my fear of not finding the one who I know has been chosen for me, but a deep insecurity that I don't reveal with many people is the fact that I am not very secure with myself and I have very little self-confidence because of a hard break up that I had quite a long time ago and the events that happened after it which have effected me forever. A lot of people say that I don't reflect it on the outside at all and I was like I do but I just do it in small ways. But especially on days like this one and yesterday, when all has not necessarily been normal, I find that I am at the weakest. Although, I believe that tribulations changes us, makes us stronger, and turns us into better people, it is the attack of morals that leads us to the compromise of our foundation, but those that build us up will always be imprints forever casted into our hearts and so with that I just want to say thank you to the girl that wrote me these words of encouragement and to those around me who make a conscious effort to uplift me in my daily endeavors.
Best Wishes, Joshua Price